The answer: yes, it can definitely! And most of it was my own fault! It all began so good with a wonderful lunch which I enjoyed with a friend (but that is worth an own post, so I'll write about that sometime later).
Well, I've met a person from mixi, which is a japanese community similar to facebook. He contacted me about half a year ago or so when I was still back home in Germany, and said he was learning German and why not meeting up in Tokyo when I start my Working Holiday. And because I'm such a nice and trusting girl I tend to give everyone a chance before I judge the person. Meeting up with blogger friends is a complete different story, because you kinda know these people by reading their blogs and have the feeling you know how they are. You also get to see fotos of the bloggers, which you don't get to see at mixi usually. So we met at Tokyo Station on the platform of the Yamanote Line. And my first thought was: now I know why he does not have a profile picture at mixi. I don't wanna sound mean or something like that and I'm surely the last person on this world to judge other people's outward appearance cause I'm not really cute and goodlooking myself but, you know, he was not the most handsome guy. We had a walk at the Emperor's Palace and hardly talked. I began to feel quite uncomfortable, as it was getting darker every minute and the area we went through was quite calm with less people. It was so weird. I was wondering what the people around us were thinking... a young girl like me (most people tell me I look like a highschool girl ) and an obviously older guy, hmmmm. I had a safety gap between us while walking. Anway, this guy really creeped me out since everytime he asked me something he touched my arm or back. I was like don't touch me, it's gross!!! I was really afraid and mailed to my friend's mobile phone to get me out of there. So I got a call, and pretended there was a problem which only I can solve, and I have to go, bye! I felt so relieved when I boarded my train. My god, this was a total desaster, and I'm sooo thankful my friend rescued me, thank you I owe you my life! XD
As I'm writing this post I'm asking myself how stupid I was to meet up with someone you have never seen or don't really know. I mean it is always risky, and sometimes it is even fun. But this has definitely taught me my lesson. I received many advices about how to deal with that problem, so let's see what I can do. My greates fear is that he developes into some kind of stalker XD And thanks again to my friend and his friend for making me feeling better again, I'm sorry for interrupting your peaceful meetup. You are great people and I'm so thankful to have such cool friends as you.
PS. That guy was a heavy smoker. That's maybe why he looked so old.
PS2: As if the day could not become any worse, when I returned home I had a big ugly guest in my room waiting for me to say hi and scare the hell out of poor Thanh Thao: a cockroach! I wanna leave this guesthouse asap and move to Charlotte's place! One more of these and I'll just die.
PS3: Sorry to all the readers who expected a great post like yesterday. See, not even in Japan everything's fine and cool... This must be a boring post for you as well, since I have no fotos as well XDD
50 Kommentare:
Thanh Thao, this post is not boring! It is good to share with us because this will help us if we should get into such a situtation ourselves and it makes us thinking again to be more careful....glad to hear your friends helped you out of it!
Oh mein Gott, wie GRUSELIG!! Ich bin so froh, dass es dir gut geht, es war wirklich eine gute Idee jemanden zu Texten mit dem Handy, dass du angerufen wirst und aus der Lage befreit wirst!
Also, auch wenn der Kerl jetzt nicht gefährlich war, in einer anderen Lage war das bestimmt die richtige Entscheidung!
Vielleicht ist es doch besser sich nur mit Leuten zu treffen die man schon "kennt". Natürlich kann man online nie sagen, dass man jemanden kennt, aber wie du schon gesagt hast, Leute die einen Blog haben und jede Woche mal was schreiben und Bilder posten, von denen kann man schon ausgehen, dass man sie ein bisschen einschätzen kann.
Ach, das tut mir leid, dass du so eine unangenehme Situation durchmachen musstest. Ich hoffe sowas passiert nicht noch mal und du triffst noch viele coole Blogger Leute!
That is too bad that guy turned out to be so creepy. I think if you let him know clearly that you are not interested in meeting him again, hopefully he will not bother you anymore. Fingers crossed.
That was also too bad that you had that uninvited guest in your room when you returned. I'm sure you will be glad when when you can move over to your friend's place. :-)
Ach du scheisse, süsse!! Hab doch auch schon gesagt, du sollst aufpassen >.<...bei mixi bin ich auch, aber ich würde mich nieeee mit jemanden da treffen, vor allem wenn die keine Fotos haben, aber auch dann bin ich vorsichtig! >.< Ich weiss du willst so schnell wie möglich neue Freunde, aber mixi ist keine gute community dafür! Bleib lieber bei den Bloggern! >.< Sei bitte vorsichtig! Der Typ wollte dich womöglich abschleppen und hat dich in ne Gegend gebracht wo es Love Hotels gibt Q.Q ....mein gott, wär ICH dabei gewesen hätt ich ihn womöglich gekillt!!!! >:(((
Red keinen Unsinn, du bist nicht hässlich und verdienst einen Ikemen! ;D Du bist soo süss! <3
Wie ist es eigentlich mit dem Job gelaufen? x3 Meld dich bald wieder mal! :-*
I don't use mixi, but I met someone on a penpal site and I had a really awesome experience. We emailed often (every day) for 6 months before meeting, and met after I had been in Japan for a month. We don't talk as much now, but before I met him, I made sure everyone in America knew as much as I did about him, hahaha!
I am paranoid I guess, but it turned out to be an okay experience.
I wish you more luck with Japanese guys! They are sooo difficult sometimes! :P
aww :( i'm sorry that this happened to you! it's good that you're safe so sad that you can't trust everyone nowadays.
<3 angie
Pandaphilia
(ps i'm having a giveaway!)
I agree with Jenny, its good for people to know the dark side of meeting people online in real life. Especially girls who are obsessive about Japan or Japanese men, they might be blind to the risks and dangers when all they think is "omg smexy azn guysysss!"
I am just so happy to hear that despite him being creepy and weird, he didn't harm you. I'm glad you got home safely to write about this.
I've had a much much much much worse experience than yours meeting an online person, and now I will only meet women. There are things we just don't think of or realize before we go into a dangerous situation TT
Oh gosh that sounds so scary!! Glad you came out of it alright!! Let's hope you don't here more from this person again :[
Wow, that's really scary! I'm happy you're okay! Please be more safe for now on!
Wow...das is ja eher unschoen gelaufen...wenigstens bist du heil rausgekommen aus der Sache. Und ich denk auch, dass du auf jeden Fall klar machen solltest, dass das euer einziges Treffen war, wenn er dir so Angst gemacht hat...man weiss ja wirklich nie, ob die nich doch mal austicken und dir auflauern oder so.
Tut mir aber Leid, dass du so eine schlechte Erfahrung machen musstest und ich bin froh, dass ich mit Yuta scheinbar so viel Glueck hatte. Hoffen wir einfach, dass nicht alle bei mixi solche freaks sind, haha ^-^
Pass aber schoen auf dich auf, nich dass du mir da weg kommst *hug*
Mach dich nicht so schlecht, von den Fotos her find ich dich sehr hübsch!♥
Zum Glück konntest du jemanden anrufen...hätte echt dumm enden können, omg xX"
grundsätzlich spricht ja nichts dagegen, leute (männer) aus dem internet (nicht nur blogger XD) zu treffen (so habe ich .a. meinen verlobten kennengelernt XD),
aber bei fehlenden profilfotos würde ich auch etwas vorsichtig werden und bei einem treffen (am besten wäre vorher zu skypen oder sonst irgendwie per webcam zu interagieren) auf jeden fall eine kollegin mitnehmen oder an einem sehr animierten ort abmachen... du hattest einfach etwas pech >.<'
OMG!! O__O das war ja keine schöne erfahrung..wie beängstigend..OO'
da wird einem erst so richtig klar dass man sich nicht mit jedem treffen sollte, aba man denkt ja eigentlich nicht so oft darüber nach..oo'
gott sei dank bist du gut rausgekommen..oo'
ps: du BIST süß und hübsch<3
ach je du arme. du musst besser aufpassen. mach so was nicht noch mal! es gibt so viele perverse männer in japan die keinen respekt vor frauen haben.
dein bericht ist so schlimm!!!! zum glück ist alles gut gegangen und iehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh ungeziefer. ich hasse die viehcher. naja immer hin hast du was dazu gelernt ne :) schon was wegen nem job gehört?
Oh no!!!!! Please be careful! Japan has lots of weirdos, but I guess weird people are just everywhere.
It's a relief you were able to get back safely and write this post!
This is a good experience to share with everyone, especially those who wants to meet people from the internet. And a good reminder to be alert especially meeting new people (guys!) in a foreign land too!
Thank you Jenny!!! If I can really help with this post and warn girls to be more careful then the horrible meet-up turned out to become something good, lol. Yeah, and I was so in panic I did not know who to call or mail to, I just maield to this friend and pleaded for help. Luckily I got outta there quite fast!
Ach Käthchen, es war so furchtbar, ich glaube auf weitere solcher Treffen kann ich gut verzichten. Der Kerl hat mir im Grunde ja nix getan, aber ich hab mich die ganze Zeit so schrecklich unwohl gefühlt, das ist immer ein schlechtes Zeichen... Naja, aber man kann ja nicht nur gute Erfahrungen machen, von daher war es auch gut mal die andere Seite kennenzulernen. Ich war so froh, dass mir die Idee mit der Mail und dem Anruf gekommen bin, irgendjemand hatte mir mal so eine ähnliche Geschichte erzählt und das ist wohl hängengeblieben XD Ich glaube ich werde nur noch Blogger treffen und keine Leute mehr von mixi.
Creepy guys are just like everywhere and I was just so unlucky to met one of them. Well, it was an experience after all, and it was good to get to know the other bad side of meeting people from the Net. Not everyone can be so wonderful like Lou or Kirin :-)
Yeah, the guest, hahaha! I'm so afraid of the word "cockroach" by now so my roommate Charlotte told me to call those monsters just "Paul", haha! So the next time we get a visit from Paul, you know who is meant!! XDDD And I will be moving to her place tomorrow, I can't stand it any longer in this guesthouse...
Lou!!!!!! Danke für deinen Kommentar, und deine aufmunternden Worte, und tut mir soooo Leid dass ich dir solche Sorgen bereitet habe!! Ich war irgendwie total blauäugig und doof, ich weiß XDDD Aber ich habe meine Lektion gelernt und das wird auch das letzte mixi Treffen gewesen sein. Ich werde jetzt nur noch Blogger treffen. Hahaha, ich wünschte du wärst dabei gewesen, du hättest ihn bestimmt an Ort und Stelle verjagt! XD Ich wollte mich eigentlich schon längst wieder bei dir gemeldet haben, aber ich habe dir heut ne Mail geschickt, die aber wieder zurückkam... Hast du die Adresse geändert?? Ich würde so gerne einfach wieder mit dir reden :-)) Wenn du Zeit hast, lass uns wieder was machen!! ^^
What are we both still doing up at this hour, lol Yeah. Tons of creepy guys everywhere, unfortunately. And at least I think we all learn something from bad experiences as well as good.
lol, Charlotte is very funny. lol, OK, I'll also call all cockroaches "Paul" from now on. Wow, that is great that you'll be able to move to her place tomorrow. I hope Mr. P will not visit on your last night. :-)
I'm glad you had such great experiences!! Usually the people I meet from the Net were wonderful people as well, so this time it was good that I experienced the other, bad side, too! Now I have definitely learned my lesson, and I will be much more careful from now on :-)
Angie!!!! Thanks for your kind words. It is really sad there are more and more creepy people out there, right? But I'm totally fine again now after the first shock, lol. Thanks to the wonderful friends I met afterwards :-)
Yeah, if my post about that bad experience may help to warn girls to be more careful then the meet-up turned out to be good for at least something! I'm happy about that ;) Yeah, and I know some of those girls who are really crazy about Japanese men, but they surely forget that not all or cool, hot and good looking, lol.
Well, he did not harm at all, it was just this creepy feeling you have inside you all the time, you felt so uncomfortable and just thought why did I agree to a meet-up etc. Thanks to my friends help I could escape safely and I thank God that I have such good friends!
I'm so sorry to hear you had an even worse experience!! But such experiences will help us to be more careful the next time.
Yeah, I really hope he just forgets about this meet-up, lol.
Thank you!!! I'm totally fine again and I'll definitely be more careful from now on!!
Ohja, ich war so froh, dass mir das mit dem Anruf eingefallen ist, und dass mir meine Freunde aus dieser doch unangenehmen Situation rausgeholt haben. Sie haben dann auch den Abend mit mir verbracht, weil sie dachten es wäre jetzt schlecht mich alleine nach Hause gehen zu lassen. Oh Gott, ich bin sooooo danbar dass ich solche gutherzigen Freunde hier hab, ich wüsste nicht, was ich ohne sie gemacht hätte.
Ja, ich wusste eh, dass ich hier auch viele schlechte Erfahrungen machen werde, von daher war das vielleicht gar nicht so schlecht. Das hat mir die Augen geöffnet und ich werde in Zukunft sehr vorsichtig sein. Ich werde wohl nur noch Blogger Freunde treffen und vielleicht auch nur nich Frauen, oder ich sollte immer jemanden mitbringen :-)
Ja, Yuta ist echt ein Glücksfang XD Aber das weißt du bestimmt sehr zu schätzen :-) Und ich pass auf, versprochen! Tut mir Leid dass ich dir solche Sorgen bereitet habe!
Oh danke, das ist sehr lieb von dir!! :-) Ja, das war ein doofes Erlebnis. Aber das zeigt ja mal wieder dass nicht alles super duper toll ist selbst hier in Japan. Ich kenne einige die mit falschen Vorstellungen hier rüber kommen, also liebe Mädchen, das Leben in Tokyo ist garantiert nicht wie in einem Shojo Manga XDDD (Wäre toll, wenn ja, hahaha)
OHHh wow that really grossed me out too! dam, that must be so scary, I'm glad that you're alright tho. I can imagine just how awkward it is. If he touched me inappropriately, I'd definitely give him a whopping slap. I would literally do that, LOl aww I hate cockroaches! dam.. what did you do to it? :D
Ja, das denke ich eigentlich auch, es gehört immer eine Portion Glück mit dazu, ich weiß von deinen Einträgen was für ein unglaublich toller Mensch dein Verlobter ist, du hattest sehr viel Glück :-) Vielleicht habe ich das ja auch mal, hahaha! Und fürs erste werde ich wohl keine mehr aus mixi treffen XDD
Danke für deine lieben Worte!! XDD Und ja, es ist halt nicht alles toll hier in Japan, was viele denken, es ist genauso gefährlich wie an anderen Orten der Welt XDD Aber ich hatte viel Glück und bin da wieder rausgekommen :-)
Es geht mir gut, nur keine Sorgen! Aber danke dass du dir trotzdem welche gemacht hast! :-) Es gbt echt viele weirdos hier, genaus wie woanders auch, und ich werde in Zuknunft sehr genau überlegen wen ich treffe und wen nicht!
Ja, das Ungeziefer hier ist echt schlimm, oder?? Ich weiß ja nicht was dir schon in Japan über den Weg gelaufen ist, aber ich hatte schon die ganze Paletts durch, riesige Schaben, tellergroße Spinnen, und anderes was ich nicht identifizieren konnte, lol.
Ne, ich hab noch nix von denen gehört, vielleicht melden die sich noch, aber ich glaube eher nicht. Aber ich bewerbe mich weiter! XDD
Thank you!!! I'll be more careful from now on! :-)
Yeah, I was soo happy to escape from that horrible meet-up! Thanks to my friend's help! I really hope I could warn some girls to be more careful about who to meet. Sometimes this can have a bad ending, which I don't hope for the sake of all young girls!!
Tom, why are you not sleeping?? You must be tired from work, aren't you? I don't know, actually I feel very tired at this moment, but on the other hand I have to finish my post from today, and still wanna pack my stuff for tomorrow's move out. Well, I guess it will become a short night again, hahaha!
I haven't seen Paul around here today, luckily. I guess I'm also becoming more and more paranoid, when I see a dark spo somewhere on the wall or floor I immediatly think it must be Paul coming back. Also before ntering the bathroom I peek with my head in first and check the situation. Lol, this must sound so weird, but I'm really afraid of creepy Paul after all, haha!
Yeah, this must have beent he creepiest incident ever in my life (well, except fot the roaches of course). Actually that guy did not harm me at all, but you know I had this bad feeling in my stomach all the time when he talked to me... Hahaha, I can already imagining you giving him a slap right into the face, lol.
Yeah, those monsters are detestable... I just freaked out when I discovered it on my wall and asked my housemate to remove it... he was my hero of the day (well of course together with the other two who rescued me earlier) XD
Ja ich hab da auch so meine Erfahrungen mit Leuten, die ich bei Mixi getroffen hab. Und meistens trifft man sich sowieso nur einmal oder so und Freundschaften entwickeln sich (zumindest in meinem Fall) nie.
Deshalb lass ich auch die Finger von so was.
Wer weiß, was das für komische Leute sind, die einen dann treffen.
Ich weiß, dass man sich ziemlich allein fühlt wenn man in Japan ist. Aber bleib lieber bei den Freunden, die du hast und die du kennst.
Du kannst ja seine Nummer und Emailadresse sperren oder?
I wish I hadn't been so subtle yesterday--when I said 3 was better than 2, I was trying to tactfully say that 3 is safer. I didn't want to sound negative and paranoid and ruin your positive outlook. Thank goodness you had friends available to help you.
Also, you have to realize you are goodlooking--and everyone needs to be careful.
Das weiß ich glücklicherweiße schon vor meinem Urlaub dort xDDD♥ Kenn genug Erzählungen, haha.
Oh, dann ist dir sowas auch schon mal passiert?? Oh Gott, es war echt total unheimlich, und von nun an lasse ich doch besser die Finger davon, da hast du schon Recht. Ich bin echt dankbar für die Freunde die ich hier schon habe, und denke auch ich sollte es dabei belassen :-)
Ja, ich glaube das kann man machen! Sollte ich auch, aber seit dem letzten Treffen kan nur eine Mail uns seitdem gar nichts mehr.
Aww, thank you, Rick!! No, you didn't ruin anything! I'm totally fine. This incident somehow opened my eyes and I'm going to be more careful from now on who to meet and who better not :-)
I met my husband on the internet <3 Be safe and bring a friend or two, but I don't think it hurts to meet people from the internet as long as nothing seems fishy. I've met dozens of people from online over the last ten years, and while some have definitely been creepy, I've met people I'm still friends with to this day!
Thanks for your kind comment!! :-) This incident will not hold me away from meeting people from the net, I'm just more cautious now about who to meet and who better not, and surely I will bring some other people with me the next time I feel I should. It is so wonderful that you met your husband on the Net!
Next time you meet up with someone, you might want to bring like two friends, especially a guy friend with you. The guy friend might help scare the creeper a tad and keep the guy in line. Just saying, be safe! :)
im just glad you're okay! and dont be afraid of roaches! Wall-E's best friend was a roach haha! okay that might not be so helpful but i hope it made you smile :) glad youre safe and ok. NEVR DO THAT AGAIN
Hi,, I just started to follow your blog and I saw this post and wanted to say that I'm sorry you met such a creep from Mixi! I've met a few people from mixi (men and women) and the first few I met (men) were mostly okay... one was a bit creepy and possessive and we met up a few times and he would always try to hold my hand or put his arm around me, but I'm pretty agressive, so I just would brush him off or walk away... but after about the 5th meeting (another man and a woman; both who were not really creepy, but totally not my type of people) I was like 'I am done with mixi' and ALMOST canceled my last meeting with a guy that I had been messaging for the past month. He'd slowly started talking to me and telling me about himself and didn't really ask me anything weird and it took him awhile to get up the courage to ask if we could meet, and we set the date and then when it rolled around I just dreaded it... and when I met him he was PERFECT and we ended up going on a date that day (rather than just meeting for coffee and chatting) and we've been dating ever since (this was a year and a half ago) sooooooooooo, don't be too discouraged! There are creeps all over the internet, so it is good to have bad experiences to keep things in perspective, but not ALL of them are bad ^^
Thanks for the advice, I shall do that!! Or I will only meet women from now on, hahaha!
Hey Bianca, thanks for your comment, and yes, it made me smile! XD I bet Wall-E's friend was much more cuter than Paul, hahaha!
Yeah, I won't do anyhing like that in the near future again, and if yes, I'll definitely bring my friends with me just to be more safe! :-)
Oh my, thanks for following my blog and for that super nice comment, Caroline!! :-) When I read it I felt like cheered up, that not all of those mixi persons are bad, hahaha! Thank you! Well, most of the people I met from the Net were blogger friends from Blogspot, and those I met were super nice and wonderful people. It is just my first mixi meet-up which was a total fail, hahaha! I'm sorry to hear you had such bad experience with mixi, too, but after all, it turned out to be something good, too right? :-) I have two friends who met their boyfriends through mixi, too as you, and they are really happy right now. But I think I won't meet anybody from mixi in the near future, hahaha! I have enough blogger friends I can meet, so, XDD
Thanks again for becoming my follower, and I hope I can give you a good read with my posts :-)
I'm glad that my comment made you feel better! I've also made a lot of friends from online blogging as well :)
I have a blogger too... but I don't know how to reply to your blog under my blogger name :/ Here's the link if you're interested.
http://carolinejosephine.blogspot.com/
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